


whatever our souls are made of (his and mine are the same)

by empireoffclouds



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, And karaoke, Angst with a Happy Ending, Daniel Ricciardo being the best friend ever, Friends to Lovers, Just read it I promise it'll all make sense, Lewis and Sebastian being and old married couple, M/M, Oh also heavy symbolism, Past Lives, References to Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, Sort Of, There's a few descriptions of violence but nothing too graphic, not beta read we die like (wo)men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:53:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27753391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/empireoffclouds/pseuds/empireoffclouds
Summary: In the time of the ancient gods, Pierre and Charles had been cursed by a jealous god to suffer an endless cycle of birth, death and rebirth. Throughout their various lives Pierre was always Pierre, and Charles was always Charles. Their last names might change, their nationalities also varied, but physically, spiritually, they were always the sameHowever, there was a catch. Because no matter the roles they had been born into in any of their lives, whenever Charles turned 22, he would die. And he would always die in Pierre’s arms.(Alternatively: a spin on the soulmates trope, where Pierre and Charles are both Formula 1 drivers in 2018, but only after having lived during innumerable time periods throughout history)
Relationships: Lewis Hamilton/Sebastian Vettel, Pierre Gasly/Charles Leclerc
Comments: 13
Kudos: 106





	whatever our souls are made of (his and mine are the same)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone, I'm back with a story I started months ago but that I just now got around to actually finishing. I am in love with this concept, and I really hope I managed to do it justice. This has some supernatural elements and a bit of ancient greek lore, but it's nothing too intense I think so even if that's not your thing I'd urge you to give it a try!
> 
> Also, I swear the Moulin Rouge AU has not been abandoned! I'm working on the next chapter and it will be finished, don't worry.
> 
> Without further ado, I hope you guys enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it 💛
> 
> (A few warnings: there's some descriptions of violence, although nothing too graphic, and there's also a description of a pretty bad accident - but remember this is angst with a happy ending so don't worry too much about it)
> 
> Oh and I also made a playlist for this, you can find it here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0lIaiMwuPDaS81xNStLmvY

“No, no, no, God, _please_ no”

Pierre sank to his knees, not being able to hold his own bodyweight as well as the one of the man he was cradling in his arms.

The onslaught of memories that hit him made it so he had to shut his eyes for a second because of how dizzy they made him, but he forced himself to open them again, even if the sight that met him was nearly too much for him to handle.

Shiny bright green eyes were staring up at him, but their light was dimming by the second.

Pierre choked on a sob.

This couldn’t be happening. Not again.

He remembered flashes of Greece, of days spent together under the Mediterranean sun, swimming in the turquoise colored oceans.

They had known happiness once, they had been by each other’s sides, they had planned to spend the rest of their lives together...

“P-Pierre” Charles managed to gasp out, but the effort sent him into a coughing fit that had thick drops of blood coming out of his mouth, the red color contrasting violently against the paleness of his skin.

The older man willed himself to blink the tears away, brushing Charles’s black hair out of his sweaty forehead with as much tenderness as he could muster.

“I’m here Charlie, I’m not leaving you”

Charles tried to smile at that, but it was clear that even the movement of his lips seemed to take too much energy out of him.

Pierre used his thumb to wipe the blood off his lover’s lips, choosing the ignore the ever-growing scarlet stain that was forming in Charles’s shirt, right above his stomach.

His breaths were coming out in an irregular pattern, short and shallow, and the death grip he had had on Pierre’s shoulder was now more of a loose hold.

“I’m sorry... I’m so sorry”

“ _Don’t_ ” Pierre croaked out, the tears finally slipping out “you don’t have to be sorry for anything”

Charles’s eyes couldn’t focus on his face anymore, but Pierre could tell he was trying his hardest as he uttered what would be some his final words.

“I-I hate to p-put you through this a-again”

More flashes of memories.

An arrow piercing his heart that first time in Sparta, a sword plunging through his flank in Marseilles, fingers slipping from his hold as he fell down a cliff in Dundee, his foot stepping over a landmine in Moscow...

Countless deaths that had come after countless lives. All of them coming too soon.

“It’s not your fault” he answered, fiercely, not wanting Charles to spend his last few seconds of this life in more suffering than he had to.

And it wasn’t his fault. There was nothing he could do about it, nothing either of them could do.

He remembered now, how Apollo had tried to have Charles for himself, how he had refused him in favor of Pierre.

How the god had not taken that rejection lightly.

They had been cursed to this existence by a force much stronger than anything they could fight, to this endless loop of birth, death and rebirth, where the outcome was always the same.

Pierre would find Charles at some point, no matter where it was they were, no matter what it was they did.

Pierre was always Pierre and Charles was always Charles. Their last names might change, their nationalities also varied, but physically, spiritually, they were always the same.

Sometimes they spent years together, be it as friends or as lovers, blissfully unaware of their fate.

Sometimes, they only had minutes.

Because no matter the roles they had been born into in any of their lives, whenever Charles turned 22, he would die. And he would always die in Pierre’s arms.

Inevitably, Pierre’s memories would come back to him during those final moments of his lover’s life, and it was exactly the same for Charles.

He didn’t know exactly what triggered it, but by the time they both remembered it was all too late.

Some of the times, when Lord Apollo was feeling more merciful, Pierre would die shortly after Charles.

He recalled one time during the Mexican Revolution, where Charles had died after being shot off his horse and Pierre had been hit by a bullet shortly thereafter, still holding his trampled body close to him.

But other times the god wasn’t as considerate, and Pierre would be forced to live the rest of his long life with one half of him missing.

He already knew this was one of those times.

Charles had jumped in front of a bullet for him, as they were walking out of a meeting with the heads of one of the most important families of New York City’s mob scene.

The shooters had run off after the deed was done, content with having gotten one of them even if the other was still standing.

Pierre had known him since they were both children in this life, his Italian American father having always did business with Charles’s Russian one.

They had celebrated the younger man’s birthday together the day before, and Pierre had been planning to tell him how he felt that same day, how he wanted to grow old with him as something more than just friends.

Now he’d never get to, not in 1956, and not in any other timeline.

That was the curse Apollo had placed upon them, a curse they couldn’t even try to break.

Pierre leaned down to kiss Charles’s blood-stained lips, not caring about the coppery taste, or the coldness that came from his vitality slipping away.

“Find me” Charles breathed out, the words only reaching him because of how close their faces still were.

“Always” Pierre vowed, knowing that he’d do anything the younger man asked of him.

Another smile graced Charles’s face at his promise, before the weak hold on his shoulder finally went slack, and the light faded completely from his eyes.

Pierre allowed himself to break down after that, violent sobs tearing through him as he cradled Charles’s lifeless body against his chest with an almost painful grip.

No matter how many times they had been through this, it always felt like it hurt more than the last one.

“Is this not enough?” he screamed, aiming his words towards the sky, a pain in his voice that came from a millennium of suffering through the loss of the love of his life, over and over again.

He must have stayed like that for at least an hour before people came to take Charles away from him, all too aware of the pitiful looks being thrown his way as he refused to let go of him at first.

But he knew he had to let go, that Charles was not with him anymore.

Pierre pressed a kiss to the top of his head, before reluctantly allowing the medics to take him away.

“I’ll find you Charlie, wherever we end up. I’ll find you”

* * *

Pierre Gasly hummed happily to himself as he walked through the paddock, feeling as content as one could.

It was 2018, and he was driving for Toro Rosso in what would be his second season in Formula 1.

Obviously, having secured one of the twenty seats available for the second year in a row was reason enough for him to be over the moon, but if he was being honest with himself, there was something else that made him even more excited than usual.

“Pierre!”

Or rather, some _one_.

“Charles” he answered, an excited grin extending across his face that mirrored the Monegasque’s as he practically skipped over to him before throwing his arms around his neck.

Pierre laughed, having missed how touchy-feely his best friend always was.

He had known Charles ever since they were children, they had been racing together just as long, and now here they were, having finally gotten to Formula 1 just like they’d always promised each other they would.

“We did it _Pierrot_ ,” Charles said softly, voice filled with awe “we actually did it”

Pierre didn’t question how Charles had known exactly what he was thinking about. It was something they’d been able to do since the moment they met, so much so that their parents joked about how maybe they had a telepathic connection.

And he wouldn’t go as far as that, but Pierre couldn’t deny that he did have some sort of sixth sense when it came to Charles. Still, he just assumed that was the case for all best friends, especially the ones who had grown up together.

“I never had any doubts about it”

Charles stepped away from the hug to beam up at him, even if he quickly squinted his eyes because of the way the sun was hitting his face and wrinkled his nose in distaste.

The Frenchman snorted, knowing how particular his friend was about the heat.

“It’s not even that hot this year Charlie, I think last year we were pushing 40 degrees”

“Anything higher than 30 is an absolute crime” he pouted, grabbing Pierre by the elbow and practically dragging him over to Sauber motorhome, instantly looking happier as they stepped into the air-conditioned space.

“I really don’t know how you’re so intolerant to the heat when you grew up in Monaco,” Pierre commented, following Charles over to sit in one of the little tables “I thought you were all supposed to love the sun”

“Yes well, I’m definitely the exception” he declared, and before he could answer Pierre had to shut his eyes tightly as a stray ray of sunlight hit him directly in the face.

Yeah, maybe he wasn’t the biggest fan of the sun either.

The two of them stayed chatting in the same position until it was time for them to get changed for first practice, and Pierre once again had to admit that he was even more excited to hit the track than he was last year.

Knowing Charles would be right there with him was enough to push away any negative or anxious thoughts he might have had at starting another season, and with the grin his friend gave him from the Sauber garage he knew that he was feeling the same thing.

Friday and Saturday seemed to fly by, and even though neither Pierre nor Charles had competitive cars they had managed not to do too badly in qualifying, with the Toro Rosso car starting P13 and the Sauber P17.

He had already heard people praising Charles’s performance, talking about how it was commendable how much he was getting out of a not-so-great car even if it was his first time competing in a Grand Prix.

And there was nothing that made Pierre prouder than seeing him succeed. He knew better than most how hard Charles worked, and how much it meant to him to see his efforts pay off.

He still remembered what he’d told him after a karting competition, where Charles had accidentally run into the barriers, effectively ending his race while Pierre managed to secure second place.

The Monegasque had been inconsolable, sitting on a bench far away from the main track with a big scowl adorning his face. No one had been able to tell him where he’d run off to, but Pierre had still been able to find him. He had a feeling he’d always be able to find him.

Charles looked like he had been ready to snap at whoever dared to talk to him while he was immersed in his self-pity, but as soon as his big green eyes landed on Pierre they softened, giving him a proud smile and congratulating him for getting on the podium.

He’d still gone right back to scowling after that, and ten-year-old Pierre had rolled his eyes at nine-year-old Charles, sitting down next to him and wrapping an arm around his shoulders to pull him into a tight side hug.

Charles had instantly melted into the embrace, resting his head on Pierre’s shoulder, sighing when the Frenchman started to gently run his fingers through his long black hair. They stayed like that for a good fifteen minutes, just enjoying each other’s presence, until Pierre felt like he had calmed down enough to actually listen to him.

“You’re going to be one of the greats Charlie” Pierre started, tightening the hold he had on him when he sensed he was about to disagree with his words “ _you will_. I’ve never been surer about anything as I am of that”

Charles scoffed “I can’t even finish a race in a kart Pierre, I doubt any team in the bigger leagues will take a driver who takes himself out, especially not Formula 1… I’m so stupid”

Pierre wanted to shake his head disapprovingly at Charles’s tendency for the dramatics, but he knew that wouldn’t help, so instead he settled for turning sideways so he could stare right into his eyes.

“One race doesn’t mean anything, and you know it. You were born to race Charles, it literally runs in your veins”

The Monegasque deflated slightly when he saw nothing but truthfulness shining in Pierre’s eyes, the pout finally falling from his lips as he thought about what he was saying. Of course that deep down he knew his friend was right, but he had never been good at losing, especially not when it was no one’s fault but his own.

Pierre could see that he had succeeded in getting to Charles, and he ruffled his hair playfully.

“You have to stop being so harsh with yourself, because I won’t let anyone talk about my best friend like that, not even yourself”

Charles snorted, and Pierre felt very proud of himself by having been the reason for the smile that was now on his face.

When Pierre thought about it, he was pretty sure that was the moment where he had fallen in love with Charles.

Even if his pre-pubescent self didn’t know enough about life and love to recognize the feeling, he had managed to pinpoint it when he was old enough to do so. And although it probably should have been terrified at the realization that he was in love with his childhood best friend, he was anything but.

Realizing he was in love with Charles felt as natural as breathing, like something that had been bound to happen no matter what.

Nonetheless, that didn’t mean that Pierre would confess his feelings for the Monegasque.

The thing was, that even if he rationally knew that Charles could never hate him, especially not for being in love with him, there was still something deep inside of Pierre that made him terrified of the possible consequences for being upfront about it and having the other man shut him out of his life.

In his mind, he thought that it would be completely selfish of him to try and have something more with Charles when their friendship was already more than enough. He would never be the one to risk that.

Even so, he couldn’t help the yearning he felt inside his heart whenever he so much as laid eyes on Charles.

“Mate, I know you’re afraid of ruining your friendship or whatever, but your pining is getting out of hand”

Pierre was snapped out of his thoughts as he turned to glare at Daniel, who had sidled up to him as he waved at the Japanese fans while leaning on the bus’s railing. He knew he should’ve gone to stand next to Dany, at least the Russian never gave him any shit about his questionable life choices.

“I don’t pine,” Pierre retorted with a scowl, bumping Dan’s shoulder with his own as the Australian just laughed at him “I _don’t_ ”

“Sure thing man, that’s why you never seem to be able to take your eyes off him whenever you’re in the same room”

The scowl on the Frenchman’s face only got deeper, and Dan dropped his teasing look as he sighed, patting his friend’s back comfortingly.

“Come on Pierre, I’ve only been around you two for a few months now and even I can tell he feels the same way” he said with an uncharacteristically soft voice, and Pierre could feel his heartbeat unwillingly speed up. Even if Daniel loved to tease him, he knew he’d never lie about something like that.

But still, he refused to let himself believe it.

The season had been pretty good for both Pierre and Charles so far, considering neither of their cars was actually competitive. And Pierre truly was elated at getting to see his best friend nearly every other week, but he could admit that their proximity really wasn’t helping him conceal his affection for the other man.

Before Charles joined Formula 1 it had been much easier to ignore how he felt, since, as the saying went, “if the eyes don’t see, the heart doesn’t feel”. But now there was no way he could keep his eyes off Charles, and the fact that Daniel had noticed was just testament to that.

However, no matter how hard it got, Pierre knew he had to keep those blasted feelings under wraps.

And Dan must have seen the stubbornness in his face, if the aggravated sigh he let out was anything to go by.

“Alrighty then. Are you gonna go to his birthday thing next week?”

Pierre nodded, grateful for the change in subject. They had a week off after Japan before they all had to fly out for the Austin Grand Prix, and Charles had decided he wanted to celebrate with his closest friends in Monaco, since he wouldn’t be back in his home country for a while after that.

“Yeah, which reminds me I still need to book a hotel”

Dan scoffed “Nonsense, you can stay with me. I live like five minutes away from Charles’s anyways”

“Are you sure?” Pierre asked, touched by his offer. Of course, he considered Dan one of his closest friends in the grid, but for some reason he always thought the Australian saw him as more of a colleague than anything else.

“Absolutely,” Daniel assured, wrapping an arm around his shoulders “the only condition is that you need to get completely plastered with me”

Pierre laughed, letting his head drop against Dan’s shoulder as he brought his own arm to rest around his waist “Deal”

And if either man had bothered to look forward, they would’ve noticed a pair of narrowed green eyes staring straight at them.

* * *

After a slightly disappointing race for both Daniel and Pierre (with the former barely missing out on a podium and the latter being just one position away from the points), the two were more than glad to keep each other company on their plane ride back to Monaco.

Charles had seemed slightly mad about Pierre not flying back with him, but he knew he was going back with Marcus, and he explained that since Dan was giving him free housing it was the least he could do.

“You do know you could have stayed with me right?” Charles had grumbled, causing Pierre to roll his eyes fondly.

“I know _calamaro_ , but I assumed you’d want to spend some time with your family and didn’t wanna intrude”

The Monegasque crossed his arms over his chest, seeming entirely unconvinced “They practically consider you family anyways”

Pierre couldn’t help the rush of warmth that flowed through him at those words. He really appreciated that Pascale, Enzo and Arthur genuinely cared about him like he was part of their family, and he also knew that his parents also considered Charles to be another son.

“I’ll be just five minutes away Charlie, for whatever you may need me”

From the way he was still pouting Pierre could tell he hadn’t fully succeeded in convincing him, but he’d thankfully decided to drop it.

As they arrived at Daniel’s place, Pierre was surprised by how nicely decorated the place was. He thought about his own apartment and how it was every bit a bachelor pad, with barely any decorations and only the most basic of furniture.

But this apartment actually seemed to reflect Dan’s personality, and he loved how the many windows allowed for the whole place to be inundated by natural light, which only made the forest green wallpaper look all the more pretty.

“Welcome to my humble abode” Dan grinned, placing both his and Pierre’s suitcases on the floor (which he’d insisted to carry, claiming he wouldn’t let him think that he was “anything but a gentleman”).

“This place is beautiful” Pierre complimented, still looking around at the various decorations loitered around the different walls and shelves.

“Thanks! Lewis hooked me up with an interior designer when I moved here”

Ah, that made a lot of sense. If there was anyone who’s taste Pierre would never doubt, it was Lewis.

Dan proceeded to give him a tour of the whole place, finally leading him to the spare room so he could settle in.

“My room is right next door in case you need anything, or even if you just want to spoon”

Pierre snorted, Dan’s tendency to flirt with anything that moved never failing to amuse him “Thanks for the offer”

Charles’s birthday fell on a Sunday, but since they all had to fly out on that day they had decided to have a small party at his place on the Saturday before that. But since it was only Wednesday, Dan and Pierre had three whole days to do whatever they pleased.

And Pierre quickly realized he had been right on his assumption that Charles would be spending most of the week with his family, since the man had barely texted him after asking whether he and Dan had gotten in alright.

However, Daniel made sure he didn’t have enough time to even think about Charles’s radio silence.

The Australian had taken it upon himself to take Pierre on a tour of all the things he usually loved to do around Monaco, many which included some physical activity of sorts, which Pierre supposed explained how he managed to maintain his enviable physique even when everyone knew how much of a sweet tooth the man had.

Dan took him hiking on the outskirts of town, he took him biking, running, swimming, and even motorbiking – which Pierre had never tried before. They had both documented the hell out of their little adventures, and Dan found it incredibly amusing how the fans all seemed to be losing their minds at the thought of them spending their free time together.

When Saturday finally rolled around Pierre was quite honestly exhausted, but he couldn’t deny he had enjoyed himself a lot, and he was also really pleased about the tan he had picked up.

Dan and Pierre had decided to walk over to Charles’s, rationalizing that if they made good on their earlier promise it was probably best for them not to be anywhere near a car.

The Australian had insisted on lending him one of his infamous “party shirts”, and even if Pierre didn’t usually wear anything nearly as extravagant as that, he had to admit he actually looked really good.

It was white, flowy, silk button-up shirt (“ _it’s cream colored you uncultured swine_ ”), with three quarter wide sleeves and a tailored collar. What really made it stand out though was the pattern, composed of hundreds of black dots beneath an array of royal-blue colored flowers.

Although he was about the same size as Dan he still drowned on the shirt, but the oversized fit suited him very much, even more so because of how much of his tan chest was visible through the buttons he had left propped open.

He had opted for a simple pair of light blue jeans to go with it, which was definitely the right choice because it just brought more attention to the shirt.

“You should definitely let me dress you more often” Daniel said as they rode the elevator up to Charles’s apartment, looking him up and down with a proud look on his face.

Daniel himself had opted for a black silk shirt similar to Pierre’s, except that the pattern on that one included different brightly colored flowers and a pair of cross-stitched tiger heads.

“Yeah, I’m not so sure about that Danny”

Before he could retort, Pierre was already ringing the doorbell, and it couldn’t have been more than ten seconds before the door opened to reveal Charles standing on the other side.

“Hey guys – oh” the Monegasque trailed off, his eyebrows raising as he took in Pierre’s outfit.

Pierre felt a deep flush rising up his neck as Charles licked his lips when his eyes landed on his very naked chest, and he didn’t even have to look over at Dan to know that he had an insufferably smug look on his face.

“Hello Charlie boy!” Dan exclaimed, effectively snapping Charles out of it and making him blush when he realized he had been staring at Pierre for way too long “Happy birthday mate”

“T-Thanks” Charles stuttered out, his flustered state making Pierre’s own flush deepen.

Daniel had to stifle a laugh at the sheer sexual tension that had inundated the air.

“Well, I’m gonna head inside to put this baby to good use” he declared, lifting up the bottle of tequila he was carrying “the night is young but I’m not getting any younger, gotta enjoy my high tolerance to alcohol while I can”

With that he brushed past Charles to head into the apartment, instantly blending in with the sizeable crowd of people that were already inside.

“Happy birthday Charlie” Pierre congratulated, effectively breaking the slightly awkward silence that had fallen over them.

Charles gave him a shy smile, one that never failed to make Pierre’s stomach do all kinds of flip flops “Thanks Pierrot. You, um, you look really good”

“Oh, thank you” the Frenchman grinned embarrassedly yet pleased at the same time “It’s Dan’s shirt though, he wouldn’t let me out of the house if I didn’t wear it”

A strange emotion flashed through Charles’s eyes at that, his previous easy smile seeming a bit strained now.

“Right, I should probably let you get back to him”

Pierre furrowed his eyebrows “What –“

“Yes, and I need to play good host anyways” he continued, almost as if he hadn’t heard Pierre “but I’ll see you around yeah?”

He didn’t even give him a chance to respond before he was turning on his heel to head back to the party, and Pierre sighed in defeat as he reluctantly followed after him.

Thankfully, it wasn’t hard at all to find Dan in between all the other people, and the older man gave him a sympathetic smile when he noticed Pierre’s glum look.

“Tequila?” he asked, holding up two shot glasses filled with a clear liquid.

“Absolutely”

That one shot quickly turned into four more and a couple of beers, and before he knew it Pierre found himself genuinely having a good time, even if he hadn’t seen Charles ever since they parted ways earlier.

He had even let Daniel drag him over to the dancefloor, and he was in near hysterics at the way the Australian grinded into him as Luis Fonsi’s and Daddy Yankee’s Despacito blasted from the speakers.

Pierre had never considered himself to be a good dancer, but it was surprisingly easy to follow along to Dan’s movements when he guided him with the firm hold he had on his waist.

“Alrighty, time for a bathroom break” Dan announced over the music after a few more songs, sounding unfairly sober after having drank double the amount Pierre had.

“Sure, I’ll just pop to the balcony for some air”

With that the two parted ways, Pierre letting out a content breath as the cool night air hit his sweaty face. He admired the Monaco skyline as he leaned against the balcony’s railing, the thousands of little lights coming from the many buildings looking almost like stars as they contrasted with the black sky.

Even if he had been having a great time with Daniel, he had to admit that he wished Charles had been the one dancing with him, the one who took him exploring his hometown, the one who cooked him breakfast in the morning.

But some things you just weren’t supposed to get, he supposed.

“Hey”

Pierre startled at the unexpected voice, quickly turning around towards the sound and relaxing when he saw it was only Charles.

“Hey birthday boy, enjoying your party?”

Charles gave him a one-shouldered shrug, “It’s alright I guess”

“Just alright?”

The Monegasque didn’t answer, instead stepping forward so he was standing closer to Pierre, both of his hands buried in his pockets.

“Does Daniel treat you alright?”

Pierre blinked slowly at the totally unexpected question, and he tried to figure out from Charles’s face if the man was drunker than he seemed.

“Well, he’s been a very good tour guide if that’s what you’re asking”

Charles huffed “Don’t play dumb, I’ve seen the way you two act together”

And well, Pierre now really was completely confused.

“Charles I honestly have no idea what you’re talking about”

Now Charles’s eyes glinted with anger, and Pierre felt borderline panicked as he noticed his jaw was clenching in the way it only did when he was truly mad.

“Jesus Christ Pierre, I’m not blind. I can tell when my best friend is in a relationship with someone”

_Wait, what?_

“Hold on, you think Daniel and I are together?”

“You really don’t have to lie to me, I’m your best friend”

“I swear to God I’m not lying”

“It’s fine,” he continued, averting his eyes to the floor so he wouldn’t have to look at Pierre “I’m very happy for you two”

“Charles –“

“I just don’t understand why you didn’t tell me sooner”

“Charles, there’s nothing going on –“

“Pierre I said it’s _fine_ why can’t you just admit it –“

“Because I’m in love with you damn it!”

Charles’s shut right up at Pierre’s exclamation, his green eyes widening in shock.

Meanwhile, Pierre could feel the icy feeling of dread running down his spine. He couldn’t believe he had just said that, not after he’d managed to keep his secret for a literal decade.

“Shit” he let out a shaky breath, running a stressed hand through his hair “I’m so sorry Charlie you were never supposed to –“

But before he could finish that sentence, Charles was surging forward and capturing his mouth with his own.

It was pure instinct that made Pierre’s arms come up to wrap around his waist, the force with which Charles had kissed him strong enough to push his back into the railing.

The Frenchman didn’t even hesitate to kiss him back, every single cell in his body screaming at him that this was what he had been born to do. That this was where he had always been supposed to be.

And Pierre had kissed his fair amount of people in his life, but none of them could even compare to how it felt to kiss Charles.

As their lips moved together, he thought he finally understood what people meant when they talked about how kissing the love of your life felt as if two puzzle pieces had finally come together, after searching for each other their entire lives.

Charles had brought a hand up to tangle in Pierre’s hair, tugging at it needily in his urge to press closer to him.

They only separated when both of them felt dizzy enough from the lack of oxygen that they were sure they would pass out if they didn’t come up for air, but their foreheads stayed pressed together even as their chests heaved with their panting.

“I love you too” Charles breathed out, his eyes both impossibly dark and yet seeming to sparkle brightly under the moonlight “I’ve loved you since I was nine years old”

Pierre thought he knew what happiness felt like, but now he knew that he’d never been more wrong in his life. Because there was nothing that could ever compare to how he was feeling right now.

“I’ve loved you since I was ten years old” he said, an elated grin lighting up his face.

The two young men started laughing after that, laughing at their shared stupidity, but most importantly, laughing for the sheer relief of knowing that their feelings were reciprocated.

“We’ve wasted so much time” the Monegasque lamented, even if the smile hadn’t left his face.

“It doesn’t matter” Pierre instantly retorted “because from now on, I know I don’t want to spend another second without you”

And he thought it wasn’t physically possible, but Charles’s beam got impossibly wider before he pulled him back down to reconnect their lips, even if kissing wasn’t the easiest thing to do when they were both still grinning like madmen.

Church bells sounded from somewhere out in the city, signaling that midnight had struck, and with it came Charles’s twenty first year in this earth.

“Happy birthday _mon ange_ ” he whispered against his lips, Charles tilting his head upwards to brush their noses together.

“I hope this is the way I start all my birthdays from now on”

Pierre chuckled, bringing a hand up to cup the younger man’s face and run a tender finger across his cheekbone “I’ll make sure of that”

Their mouths came together once more, and the two stayed like that for a very long time. Tangled in each other’s arms, the party all but forgotten as they reveled in the other’s touch while the streams of moonlight washed over them, like a shield, making them stand out from the darkness of the night.

* * *

If anyone asked Pierre about how his relationship with Charles had changed ever since they’d gotten together, he would find it hard to come up with an answer.

Because he didn’t feel like much had changed between them. They spent as much time together as they could, they joked around, they had long talks… but those were all things they had been doing for years now.

If he had to explain it, the only way he could put it into words was saying that everything was the same, only _better_.

Being with Charles, in a romantic relationship, felt as natural to him as breathing.

They still hadn’t told many people about them, apart from Daniel (who they didn’t so much tell rather than he saw them making out in the balcony), Brendon and Marcus (since both Charles and Pierre decided he needed someone to cover for him when he sneaked out of his hotel room on the weekends), and Sebastian and Lewis.

Sebastian and Lewis’s marriage was the paddock’s best worst-kept secret, so they knew it was entirely safe to come out to them and ask them for advice. The only downside to that was that the two men had taken it upon themselves to act like their overbearing parents, especially since it was announced that Charles would be taking Kimi’s place at Ferrari for the 2019 season and Pierre would be moving up to Red Bull.

But Pierre supposed they really couldn’t complain about being taken under two World Champions’ wings.

And Pierre was stupidly proud about Charles becoming the youngest Ferrari driver since 1961, especially after only having been driving in F1 for a single season. Charles was equally as proud of Pierre, and the two were completely ecstatic about getting to race each other in cars that were actually competitive.

Or at least that was the plan.

Charles had immediately started getting podiums at Ferrari, his maiden one coming only in the second race of the season after also getting his first pole position. He also managed to get up there four times in a row in Canada, Austria, France and the UK, with another pole to his name in Spielberg.

Pierre, on the other hand, hadn’t been as lucky.

He didn’t understand why he just couldn’t seem to adjust to Red Bull. It felt as though nothing he did was enough for Christian, and even if it sounded dramatic, he truly felt like the car didn’t want to work with him.

The pressure he felt to perform as well as his teammate was suffocating. He had once overheard a conversation between Dr. Marko and Horner, where they were talking about how his poor performance was due to the fact that he was “driving with fear”.

Which Pierre thought was a very unfair thing to say, since the reason he was scared in the first place was that he didn’t feel an ounce of support from the team.

Daniel had warned him about it, about how suffocating it could feel at Red Bull, but Pierre was ashamed to admit that he hadn’t really believed the Australian, mostly because he could be as dramatic as Charles on any given day.

And God, when he had told Charles about that particular incident, he nearly had to physically restrain his boyfriend from marching over to their motorhome and fist-fighting his team principal.

“I can’t believe the audacity that old man has to question your talent. He cannot possibly expect you to perform as well as Max when it’s perfectly clear he’s the one being favored! I ought to give him a piece of my mind!”

Even though Pierre had been stress personified for the past few weeks, hearing Charles so readily defend his honor was enough to fill him with warmth, and he took a hold of his hand as he passed in front of him for the hundredth time since he’d started pacing around the hotel room, pulling him down on the couch next to him.

“You really don’t have to fight my battles Charlie” Pierre assured him, wrapping his arms around him so that he would finally stay still “I do appreciate it but it’s pointless”

“It’s not pointless” Charles grumbled, but still relaxed into his embrace “Defending you would never be pointless”

The Frenchman smiled sadly “Thank you _chéri_ , but it is. Christian told me today that I’m getting demoted, they’re putting Alex on my seat and I’m taking his at Alpha Tauri”

Charles’s face fell, and he quickly brought Pierre closer so his boyfriend could bury his face against his neck. They stayed like that for a few minutes, and the younger man could feel his heart break when he felt tears splashing against his skin.

“You’re going to prove them wrong my love,” he murmured, carding gentle fingers through his hair “you’ll prove them all wrong”

Pierre genuinely didn’t know how he’d cope with his demotion if it wasn’t for Charles. Of course, Daniil had also done his best to make him feel welcome at the team, and Franz had always been like an uncle to him. But neither of them could comfort him like his boyfriend could.

At the time, it seemed like getting thrown out of Red Bull after barely half a season was the end of the world.

But then Spa happened, and Pierre was harshly reminded that there were infinitely worst things than that.

Anthoine’s death hit him harder than anything ever had. From the moment he saw the crash, something inside him knew, even though he wanted nothing more than to hold onto the hope that he would be alright.

Charles instantly came to find him at his motorhome, not giving a damn about the rules that banned drivers from entering other teams’ premises, and one look at him was enough to make the Frenchman break down in his arms.

The Monegasque held him against his chest as he fell to the ground, whispering sweet nothings in his ear, knowing that there wasn’t anything more that he could do at the time.

Even if Charles couldn’t hold his hand all throughout the weekend, he made sure to always be right next to him, pressing his shoulder firmly against Pierre’s as they stood in the driver’s circle to honor Anthoine, and he kept a hand on his back as they went to talk to his parents.

And although Pierre’s race wasn’t the best, Charles made sure to honor his friend by dedicating his first win to him.

That was a very bittersweet night, with Pierre struggling to show Charles how stupidly proud he was of him even as he felt as though the grief would crush him any second.

Thankfully, he knew that Charles understood. He always did, even without him having to express it through words.

By the time Monza rolled around, Pierre was feeling lighter.

No one understood what losing someone was like better than Charles, and having him to lean on and to help him through his grieving process had been immensely helpful for Pierre. Daniel had also approached been extremely supportive during this time, and the Frenchman was truly grateful that he’d built such a strong relationship with the man the year before.

It turned out that going back to Alpha Tauri had also been the best thing that could have happened to him. There was no questioning that the environment in the “smaller” team was much nicer than the one at Red Bull, and Pierre slowly but surely felt his confidence growing back thanks to the support he got from everyone at the team.

Because of all this, he could properly celebrate Charles winning Ferrari’s home race.

Pierre knew if he said it out loud, most people would think he was insane. But watching his boyfriend climbing to the top step of the podium, as the roars of the Italians sounded loud enough that they actually made the ground shake, he thought that he felt prouder than he would if it was himself who was up there.

Charles looked almost ethereal as the confetti rained down on him and he got sprayed by champagne by Lewis and Valtteri, and if Pierre didn’t know any better, he would have thought that the sun shined just a little brighter as he lifted his trophy high in the air.

The Frenchman made sure to properly show his boyfriend how proud he was that night, and they spent an entire week after that holed up in Charles’s place in Italy, basking in the happiness his victory had brought both of them.

It finally seemed, as though things were getting better, and before either of them knew it, it had been almost a year since they’d gotten together.

Having a race on the exact day of Charles’s birthday was both a blessing and a curse.

A curse, because they had to spend most of the weekend apart, attending to their respective media and team duties. A blessing, because at least they were sure that they’d be in the same country.

Pierre had organized a surprise dinner party at one of Suzuka’s finest seafood restaurants (to Lando’s great displeasure), arranging for it to be closed off only for them and some of the other drivers.

Lando, Alex, George, Daniel, Nicky and even Lewis and Sebastian had all agreed to go, and Pierre had felt his heart soar when Charles nearly started crying at the sight of their friends.

The Monegasque had had an incredible maiden season with Ferrari so far, but Pierre knew that it had been more than a little taxing on his mental health.

And Charles would never complain about it out loud, because he was too worried about Pierre and too scared to sound ungrateful, or like he didn’t appreciate having achieved the dream millions had and only few achieved.

The dream Jules had had.

So, Pierre decided it was his turn to try his best to help his boyfriend relax. And right now, as they neared the end of the season, it was the perfect time to help him let loose even if just for one night.

Dinner was exactly the distraction they had all needed before the race, and they somehow even managed to not talk about Formula 1 for the entirety of it.

Lewis talked about the music he was working on, while Sebastian smiled proudly and assured them all it was the best thing he’d ever heard, and Daniel teased that it was only good because he featured on the drums in some of the tracks.

Alex talked about his ridiculous number of cats and how he could actually distinguish all of their meows because of their pitch, which made Lando roll his eyes since they all sounded the same to him when they wouldn’t shut up during his streams.

And George talked about how he was still pissed that the walls of their new flat hadn’t been painted the exact shade of eggshell white he had requested, while Nicky shook his head fondly and assured them all it still looked great.

It was just the sort of easy camaraderie Pierre knew that Charles had needed before a race that was always stressful to him, and the way he squeezed his hand and shot him a grateful look let him know it had worked.

After dinner was over, they’d decided to take things to this karaoke bar that was right next to the restaurant.

(It was testament to how effective Charles’s puppy eyes were that they even convinced Seb and Lewis to go with them).

The bar was a tiny building sandwiched between the restaurant and a bookshop, with a neon sign that read “The Golden Apple” that made it seem incredibly inviting.

Pierre couldn’t remember having seen it when they arrived, but he supposed he just wasn’t paying enough attention.

When they stepped into the building, they were pleasantly surprised to find out it was completely empty, which was especially weird on a Saturday night.

“Hello boys, how can I help you?”

The entire group startled, none of them having seen the young woman who had appeared in front of them seemingly out of nowhere.

“Oh hi, um, could we have a table for nine please?” Pierre asked politely, feeling a little unnerved when the woman’s sapphire blue eyes focused on him, almost like she was looking right at his soul.

He was pretty sure she was one of the prettiest women he had ever seen in his life - if not the prettiest. But there was something almost... unnatural about her beauty.

Her pale skin seemed to shine under the bar’s strobe lights, and it looked all the more striking because of her deep black hair that fell almost all the way down to her waist, held back by a blue headband decorated with stars.

She was wearing a coral blue dress that stopped just below her knees, and it had a white mesh top that also transformed into long sleeves.

And from her thin neck hanged a silver necklace with a pendant in the shape of an A, made entirely out of small gemstones that looked very much like actual sapphires.

For lack of a better word, Pierre thought that she looked ethereal, and if the looks on the faces of the others were anything to go by, they had definitely also noticed.

But even if the woman’s beauty was otherworldly, Pierre couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d seen her somewhere before.

And the way she was looking at him told him he wasn’t the only one who felt the familiarity, and the sparkle in her eyes suggested that she knew something he didn’t.

“Why of course, and don’t worry, I’m quite sure we won’t get more costumers tonight” she winked, not waiting for a response before turning on her heel and guiding them to a large table right in front of the stage.

As they all sat down, Pierre noticed that there were already various soft drinks lining the table, but none of them questioned it. It felt normal, kind of.

“All you have to do is select the song you want in this little tablet and it will automatically get queued on the system” she explained, placing a tablet on the table that they hadn’t noticed she was carrying “and if you need anything please let me now, my name is Cypria”

Pierre was sure he wasn’t hallucinating when she looked right at him and Charles as she said her name, and her eyes seemed to literally light up when she noticed their joint hands.

“Thank you, you’re very kind” Lewis answered for all of them, making Cypria tear her gaze away from the couple so she could give him a soft smile.

“You’re one of my favorites” the woman murmured, and although it could have been interpreted as Lewis being one of her favorite drivers, Pierre had an inkling that that wasn’t what she was referring to.

Apparently, Lewis also knew, and he only beamed happily at her.

With that, Cypria left the table, and although there was no doubt she was very out of the ordinary, none of them felt uneasy at her attitude.

Ever since they’d stepped into the bar, they had all been filled with a sense of content, so much so that Pierre would almost describe it as the feeling being in love gave you.

“Alright, who’s up first?” George asked with a clap of his hands, snapping them all out of the trancelike state they had fallen into.

It came as no surprise that Dan offered to sing the first song, giving a pretty spot-on rendition of Super Bass without even having to look at the screens to follow the lyrics.

He even knew the choreography from the music video, and honestly Pierre was sure that if there was a pole on the stage Dan would have gone full stripper on them.

“Thank you, thank you” the Australian bowed, all of them cheering and clapping like he’d won a GP “now I think since I offered to go first, I can nominate our favorite married couple to come up here and do a duet”

Sebastian instantly started shaking his head while Lewis only laughed, all the youngsters instantly begging for them to actually do it.

“Come on Sebby, let’s show them how it’s done” Lewis said, and it was honestly adorable how one look into the Brit’s eyes had Sebastian sighing in defeat and standing up to go to the stage.

“Fine,” he huffed, even is his mouth curved into an amused smile at the excited hoots of the others “but Nicky chooses the song, he’s the only one I trust out of you lot”

Nicky grinned evilly at that, and you could pinpoint the moment when Sebastian realized he’d made a terrible mistake.

Charles burst out laughing when the first few notes started playing and horror instantly dawned on Seb’s face, a stark contrast to the sheer elation that showed on Lewis’s.

“Dibs on being Elton!”

Seb rolled his eyes fondly at his husband and decided to resign himself to his fate.

“ _Don’t go breaking my heart_ ”

“ _I couldn’t if I tried..._ ”

It was hilarious to see Lewis put on a real effort while Sebastian only deadpanned his parts, but as the song progressed not even the German could resist the powers of Elton John and Kiki Dee and he actually looked like he was enjoying himself.

That was probably more because he could never be unhappy while watching Lewis be happy, but regardless, they actually managed to put on a solid performance.

(Charles had of course taken a video of the whole thing and instantly sent it to the group chat, thinking the blackmail material could come in handy some day).

Even Cypria cheered when the song ended, looking almost like a proud mother as she grinned at Lewis.

“Alright, clearly no one’s going to beat us, but” Lewis started, a cheeky glint in his eyes “I nominate Pierre to try anyways by serenading the birthday boy”

And well Pierre would’ve never said no to Lewis, but even if he’d wanted to, the way Charles almost started to vibrate with excitement would’ve been more than reason enough for Pierre to agree.

“Do you want to choose the song Charlie?” he asked, turning to face his boyfriend and feeling the butterflies in his stomach start to flutter.

It surprised him how they still fluttered even after they’d been together for a whole year now.

Charles shook his head, before pressing a chaste kiss on his lips “Surprise me”

Pierre smiled stupidly at his boyfriend, and really, he only had to think for a second before he knew exactly which song he had to pick.

He knew Charles loved that song, had heard him sing it in the shower more times than he could count, and it just felt appropriate.

As he stepped foot in the stage the overhead lights turned a bright pink, and Cypria winked at him as the music started playing.

Pierre saw that Charles recognized the song from the first second, and his eyes widened before a massive smile took over his face.

“ _You think I'm pretty_

_Without any make-up on_

_You think I'm funny_

_When I tell the punch line wrong_

_I know you get me_

_So I'll let my walls come down, down_ ”

The Frenchman had never prided himself in his singing voice, but by the adoring look in Charles’s eyes you would’ve sworn he had a voice to rival Freddie Mercury’s.

“ _Before you met me_

_I was alright_

_But things were kinda heavy_

_You brought me to life_

_Now every February_

_You'll be my valentine, valentine_ ”

George had started to sing along to the lyrics right by Nicky’s ear, the Canadian blushing madly while also grinning like crazy.

Dan was of course also singing out loud, his arm draped around Lando’s shoulders as the two swayed to the beat of the music and Alex looked on in amusement.

“ _Let's go all the way tonight_

_No regrets, just love_

_We can dance until we die_

_You and I_

_We'll be young forever_ ”

Even with their friends’ antics, as Pierre sang those words, he couldn’t focus on anything that wasn’t Charles.

As cheesy as it sounded, there was no place where he could get lost in as much as in those sparkling green eyes.

“ _You make me feel like I'm living a, teenage, dream_

_The way you turn me on_

_I, can't, sleep_

_Let's runaway_

_And don't ever look back_

_Don't ever look back_ ”

He could see Charles’s breath hitch, clearly sensing the way Pierre meant every word that was coming out of his mouth.

And he did. He was certain that if Charles asked him to drop everything and run away, he would follow without a second of hesitation. He’d follow him even without him having to ask.

“ _My, heart, stops_

_When you look at me_

_Just, one, touch_

_Now baby I believe_

_This, is, real_

_So take a chance_

_And don't ever look back_

_Don't ever look back_ ”

God, Pierre felt dizzy by how much he actually loved Charles.

Of course, he had known that he was in love with him, that had probably been one of the few things he’d always been sure of during his lifetime.

But right now, he felt like he could burst with how much love flooded his system as he and Charles kept staring straight into each other’s eyes.

Suddenly the cheesy pop song he was singing took a whole new meaning, and he tried to transmit the extent of his emotions for the younger man with every word he sang.

As soon as the song ended Charles was bolting up from his seat and bolting to Pierre’s arms, jumping up to wrap his legs around his waist and place a searing kiss to his lips.

Pierre was distantly aware that their friends were whistling at them as they kissed, but if he had already been hyper-focused on Charles as he sang, the moment their lips connected it was as if every single neuron in his brain had shut off.

When Charles finally pulled back his eyes were sparkling with mirth, and fuck Pierre promised himself right then and there that he’d give his life for him to never lose that spark.

“I love you” Charles breathed out, still so close to Pierre that he nearly spoke the words into his mouth.

“And I you, more than you’ll ever know” Pierre responded, pressing another soft kiss to his lips.

After Pierre’s serenade, Nicky and George took the stage to sing a very dramatic rendition of Total Eclipse of the Heart, and then Daniel decided to have another go but this time he went the more classic route and sang Like A Rolling Stone (terribly off key, of course).

Finally, Alex and Lando gave a performance of Fergalicious that none of them would ever forget, and it seemed appropriate to end the night on that very high note.

Pierre went over to where Cypria was standing behind the bar, intent on giving her his card so he could pay for everything, but the woman refused to accept it.

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it Pierre, this one’s on the house” she assured him, which just cemented his belief that she knew them from something other than Formula 1.

If she only knew them as drivers it would make no sense to turn down his payment, since she’d know they were more than capable of paying.

“Are you sure? It’s really no problem at all”

Cypria shook her head “I’m sure, there’s no need for that here”

“Well thank you very much then,” Pierre smiled, pocketing his wallet “we had a great time”

The woman once again gave him that stare that made Pierre feel like she was searching his soul, but it didn’t feel as uncomfortable as he would’ve expected.

His heart was screaming at him that there was something he should be getting from this interaction, but his brain simply refused to cooperate.

Cypria then placed her hand lightly on top of his own, which was still resting on top of the bar, and he felt shivers erupting from his skin at the warmth of her touch. She let him go after a few seconds, but the warmth he had felt seemed to stay with him.

“It will all make sense in due time, little one, you’ll be okay”

Pierre didn’t even question how that cryptic statement seem to answer the inner workings of his mind, instead reflecting the small smile that Cypria was giving him.

“Thank you” he repeated, before heading back to the others who were already waiting for him at the door.

Before exiting the building, he turned to look at Cypria one last time, and if he didn’t know it to be impossible, he would’ve sworn there was a silhouette of bright light encapsulating her whole body that hadn’t been there before - or at least not that he’d noticed.

After saying their goodbyes to the others Pierre and Charles ended up riding back to the hotel with Lewis and Sebastian, since Mercedes, Ferrari and Toro Rosso were all staying at the same place.

The four men had to be extremely sneaky as they entered the building and went up to their rooms, since they really weren’t supposed to stay up until nearly midnight the day before a race.

They parted with Sebastian and Lewis when they reached their floor, Pierre and Charles sharing an amused look at how it was clear the two men could barely keep their hands off each other as they made their way out of the elevator.

“Do you think we’ll be like them?” Charles asked as the doors closed again, turning to look at Pierre with a hopeful glint on his eyes.

“What, old and hopelessly in love?” he joked, smile widening at the little snort his boyfriend gave out.

“Well, yes. Even if I wouldn’t put it in those words”

Pierre stepped closer to Charles then, cupping his cheeks with the palms of his hands to bring their faces close together.

“There’s no one I would rather be old and hopelessly in love with than you Charlie”

The Monegasque’s gaze turned incredibly soft at that, and he leaned forward to press their foreheads together.

“Good,” he murmured “because there’s no one I would rather be old and hopelessly in love with either”

As soon as the elevator doors opened Pierre was grabbing Charles’s hand and dragging him towards his room, wasting no time before quickly pulling him inside and pressing him against the door to kiss the living daylights out of him.

Later that night, as they were both laying naked on the bed, with Charles sleeping with his head pressed against Pierre’s chest, the Frenchman could hear precisely when the clock struck midnight.

“Happy birthday my love” Pierre murmured, running lazy fingers through Charles’s soft hair “I love you”

And that’s how he fell asleep shortly afterwards, with his fingers still tangled in black hair and his heart feeling fuller than it had in a very long time.

* * *

After the night they’d had, Pierre expected to wake up feeling content like he always did when he could sleep in the same bed as Charles – but as he opened his eyes, he soon found out he felt anything but.

He frowned, trying to think of a reason why his chest was feeling so tight, almost as if his body was tensing in anticipation to something.

Pierre shifted his gaze towards the man draped across his chest, his frown deepening when the tightness on his chest only grew stronger.

It almost felt like the nerves he felt during his first Formula 1 race, but he hadn’t felt them in years, so there was no reason for them to resurface now.

He ran a gentle hand through Charles’s hair, and the pressure lifted slightly when the younger man let out a happy sigh and cuddled closer to him.

Pierre always thought that Charles looked beautiful, but there was something special about the innocence he radiated when he was asleep, when the composure he worked so hard to project all the time could finally melt away.

Like this, he almost resembled the tiny eight-year-old he had fallen in love with.

Even though he knew it’d probably wake him up, Pierre couldn’t help himself and leaned down to press a kiss on top of his head, and it indeed caused Charles’s eyes to flutter open.

No matter how many times he was confronted by that sight, watching Charles blink up at him with sleepy eyes would always make his heart fill with warmth.

“Happy birthday _mon ange_ ” the Frenchman murmured, lips twitching upwards at the bashful look his boyfriend still got whenever he complimented him.

“Thank you Pear” Charles said through a yawn, without lifting his head from Pierre’s chest “ah I really wish we didn’t have to race today, I wanna lay here all day and spend my birthday just with you”

Pierre’s heart fluttered at that idea, but he knew there was no way of it happening,

“Careful _calamaro_ , your age is showing”

The Monegasque snorted “Bold of you to call me old when you’re one year older than me”

“It’s too early to be reminded of my cradle robbery _chéri_ ” Pierre teased, laughing when Charles rolled his eyes.

“You didn’t even kiss me until I turned twenty-one!”

“Well excuse me for wanting to preserve your innocence, I never would’ve thought that sweet little boy I met in 2005 would turn into such a drama queen at twenty-two”

That weird feeling tugged at his chest as he said the words _twenty-two_ , but before he could linger on that thought Charles was pouncing on him and pining his arms over his head, so it was safe to say he quickly forgot all about it.

No matter how much they wanted to stay in bed, they soon had to leave its warmth and get ready to head out to the track.

They both knew neither Sebastian nor Daniil were above personally coming to their room to drag them downstairs if they didn’t show their faces at breakfast soon (it had happened before), and that was something they’d very much like to avoid.

And usually Pierre loved to tease Charles about how needy he was, but for some reason this morning he was the one reluctant to let his boyfriend leave his arms.

Even when Charles got into the bathroom to take a quick shower, the Frenchman couldn’t help but feel the need to barge into the tiny room and hold him close again.

But instead he just shook his head, trying to clear his mind of those ridiculous thoughts. Maybe he was feeling funky because of something he ate at the dinner last night, that was probably it.

The two headed to the dining room after Pierre had also showered, and although they normally tried to be discreet in public, he couldn’t help but keep a firm hold of Charles’s hand.

He just felt better by the physical confirmation that his boyfriend was next to him, and it served to quiet the anxiety that had taken ahold of him for some bizarre reason.

Charles shot him a curious glance when the elevator doors opened and Pierre didn’t let go, but he decided not to comment on it and they just strolled into the hall like that.

Most of the people there were from Ferrari or Alpha Tauri anyways, and they either didn’t care about their relationship or they were already used to it. A lot of people did approach them to wish Charles a happy birthday though, and the Monegasque only thanked them in a quiet voice, confused as to why Pierre’s hand tightened around his anytime someone else congratulated him.

Pierre himself didn’t know what was going on with him, but he simply couldn’t help it.

Breakfast was a quiet affair, since although Pierre tried to act like everything was normal, he knew that Charles had picked up on the weird mood he was in. They just knew these things about each other, and they didn’t even question it anymore.

Because of this Charles also knew that it was useless to try and get him to talk when there was something else on his mind, so he settled for keeping a soft chatter about mindless subjects to try and distract his boyfriend from whatever it was that was bothering him.

Charles insisted on driving them both to the circuit, wanting to give Pierre some time to put his scattered brain in order before he’d actually have to get behind a steering wheel.

But what Charles didn’t know was that this wasn’t one of those times where Pierre was simply feeling a little out of it, no, this was something else, and the fact that he didn’t know what it was was really stressing him out.

“Is everything alright?” Charles finally dared to ask when they were pulling up to the paddock, his green eyes filled with worry as he stared at his boyfriend’s face that was contorted in a frown - something very out of character for him.

“Yeah,” Pierre answered, but his voice was a little strained “I’m just feeling a little weird today, it was probably the shellfish”

The Monegasque nodded, although he didn’t seem to believe him “Will you be okay to drive?”

“Yeah, I’ll just have some sparkling water to settle my stomach and I’m sure it’ll pass” he forced a smile, but this only served to make Charles worry further.

“Okay but you’ll call me if you need anything yeah? Or at least let Daniil or Franz know”

“I promise Charlie” Pierre squeezed his hand in what he hoped was a reassuring manner, and by the little grin he got in return he assumed it worked.

However, when Charles turned around to open the door the feeling rushed through Pierre like a tidal wave, and before he even knew what he was doing he reached towards his boyfriend and pulled him into his chest.

Charles gave a surprised “oof”, but he instantly relaxed against the older man’s embrace. The angle was slightly awkward because of the gearshift between them, but neither of them cared.

Pierre only brought a hand up to tangle it in Charles’s black hair and leaned backwards just enough so that he could capture his lips in a kiss.

Usually they would never kiss in a public place so close to the paddock, not even in the car, since you never knew who might be watching. Except this time Pierre couldn’t physically help it.

What started as a soft kiss quickly turned into an almost desperate one, almost like Pierre was trying to pour everything inside his heart into the young man he was holding in his arms.

Charles pulled away only when the need for oxygen was too strong to ignore, but still kept his forehead pressed against Pierre’s, chest heaving up and down.

The Frenchman cradled his face with his hands, staring deeply into his eyes.

“Drive safe okay Charles?”

He didn’t know what possessed him to say that, since he knew his boyfriend wasn’t a reckless driver, and he knew all too well how important it was to be careful on the track.

And yes, Suzuka was always a track that made Pierre and Charles remember exactly how dangerous the sport was, that reminded them both of what they had lost. But he thought he had been getting better at pushing those feelings away.

Charles was evidently confused by his words, but he must have heard the seriousness in Pierre’s voice because he didn’t even try to argue with him, instead just nodding his head.

“Always”

After that, Pierre was forced to let him go, Charles giving him a reassuring smile before getting out of the car and walking towards the Ferrari garage.

With every step that he took away from him, he felt the sense of dread looming over him grow bigger and bigger.

He furiously rubbed at his eyes, like he could somehow wipe away that awful, unfounded feeling that had seemingly come out of nowhere.

Pierre felt like he was in a daze as he went over his usual pre-race routine, and if the worried glances Daniil kept shooting him were anything to go by, it was very obvious that his mind wasn’t in the right place.

“Are you okay mate?” Dany asked when he had to repeat himself for what seemed like the fifteenth time that day, and now Pierre couldn’t even bring himself to lie.

“Not really” he started, making the Russian’s forehead crease “I’ve been feeling off all morning, no idea why”

Dany crossed his arms over his chest “Will you be okay to drive?”

“Yeah, I’m sure it’ll go away when I get into the car”

His teammate looked skeptical at that, but thankfully decided not to push it.

When all the drivers were getting ready to go on track, Pierre couldn’t help but crane his head up every couple of minutes to try and get a glimpse of Charles, but it was nearly impossible because of all the people surrounding him.

He could vaguely make out the bright red of the Ferrari car at the distance, but it wasn’t enough to ease his mind.

Pierre was getting strapped into his own car all too soon, and he shut his eyes tightly and shook his head a few times to try and pull himself together.

The warmup lap indeed served for him to get into the zone he usually did whenever he raced, but as he positioned his car in the third line just behind Charles and Daniel, that blasted feeling came back in full force.

Before he knew it, it was lights out, and it was testament to how distracted Pierre was that two cars managed to overtake him because of how awful his start had been.

“ _Merde_ , come on just focus” he muttered to himself angrily, knowing that in normal circumstances he should’ve been able to easily guard off Sainz and Lance.

Pierre somehow managed to block out every thought that wasn’t driving-related, and it only took him two laps to get back to his starting P5.

Max had overtaken Charles to secure P3, which meant that Pierre was now tailing the Ferrari by less than a second.

They had raced against each other so many times before, and there was nothing they enjoyed more than the thrill of battling it out on track.

Except that this time, the Frenchman just felt anxiety gnawing at him as he stared at the back of his boyfriend’s car.

And their relationship had never, not once, had a negative impact on his driving. He was always able to put aside any thoughts of the two of them the second his helmet came on. What had changed?

Pierre spent the next five laps virtually in the same position, not getting closer to or further from Charles. Pierre was telling him that it was alright for him to push a little more, that he could probably overtake him.

But something was holding him back, something inside him was telling him to be careful.

And Pierre had always been one to trust his intuition, but he was so confused by it today. The sun was shining bright above the track (almost too bright), and there wasn’t a single cloud in the sky... perfect racing conditions.

So then what was it?

Suddenly a ray of sunlight seemed to flash right towards him, and since he couldn’t precisely bring an arm up to shield his eyes, he settled for shutting them tightly for a second.

It had been just one second.

When his eyes opened back up, it was pure instinct that made him slam down on the brakes, the aggressive movement sending the car spinning into the gravel before it came to a stop.

Everything seemed to be going in slow motion.

He saw the Ferrari lurching forwards, the car doing a full flip in the air before the nose slammed back on the ground, the force of the impact making it roll over and over again on the gravel, stopping only when it collided with the barriers.

Pierre wanted to scream, but it died in his throat as he was suddenly hit with a violent rush of memories.

Greece, Charles, Apollo.

The curse.

“No” Pierre gasped, practically ripping the seatbelts off himself and not bothering to shut down the car as he hastily climbed out of it, taking off his helmet and throwing it to the ground.

He couldn’t take more than 5 shaky steps towards the wreckage before another wave of memories sent him tumbling to the ground, a shaky breath falling from his lips as his head pounded from the sheer number of images it was trying to process.

It took every single ounce of strength he had in his body for Pierre to get up, and when he did, he forced himself to sprint even if he felt like he was going to throw up any second.

The car had mercifully landed in a way that Pierre had relatively easy access to the cockpit, and he had to choke down a sob when he saw that Charles wasn’t moving.

The unconscious Monegasque was hanging upside down, kept in place only by the seatbelts, so no matter how much he wanted to just get him out as quickly as possible Pierre knew that he had to try and be careful.

His hands were shaking so violently that it was a miracle he managed to unclasp the belts, Charles’s deadweight falling into his awaiting arms.

Pierre dropped down to his knees, cradling the younger man to his chest and removing his helmet.

Charles had his eyes closed, skin already a sickly shade of white, with two thin streams of blood trickling down his nostrils.

“No, no, no, God, _please_ no”

Pierre frantically pressed his ear against Charles’s chest, the tears that were pooling in his eyes finally starting to fall when he didn’t hear a heartbeat.

“No!” he bellowed, shakily wiping the blood off Charles’s face with his thumbs.

This couldn’t be happening, not again.

The Frenchman gagged as the next wave of memories made his head spin, and he had to shut his eyes tightly and shake his head to snap out of it.

No. He wasn’t letting Charles go, not this time.

He quickly laid him down on the gravel, placing his hands over his chest in a triangular figure and pressing down in quick succession.

If Apollo wanted Charles, the god would have to personally come down from the heavens and physically rip him out of his hands damn it.

Pierre had no idea how long he had been administering CPR for, hell he wouldn’t even be able to tell you where they were, or what year it was.

But then there was a cough, Charles’s body lurching forwards as dark red blood came out of his mouth and splattered on Pierre’s white fireproofs.

Pierre felt like he couldn’t breathe, dizzy not from an onslaught of memories this time, but because of the sudden rush of hope that hit him like a freight train.

“Charles? Charlie, can you hear me?”

Charles’s eyes fluttered minutely, but that was enough for Pierre to break down in tears.

Suddenly someone was placing a hand on his shoulder, and Pierre didn’t even turn to look at who it was before he was launching himself forward to shield Charles with his own body.

“No, I won’t let you take him away” he snarled, the confusion, panic and consequent relief muddling together to leave him an incoherent mess.

“Mr. Gasly we need to take him to a hospital, right now”

Mr. Gasly? Was that him?

Pierre finally tore his eyes away from Charles to look at the person who was speaking, his brow furrowing when he saw a man wearing a white uniform standing there, a concerned look plastered on his face.

He blinked, trying to get his thoughts back in order.

It was 2019, he was Pierre Gasly, a Formula 1 driver, they were in Japan, that man was part of a medical team.

“Mr. Gasly if you don’t let us take him he _will_ die, do you understand me?”

 _Die_.

That single word was enough to nearly send him into a panic attack, but before that could happen someone else kneeled next to him, and he felt himself relax slightly when he met the kind brown eyes he knew belonged to Lewis.

“Pierre, he’ll be alright, you saved him. Now let these men help” the Briton reassured, careful to keep his voice calm so as to not spook him further.

“He’s been here in my heart before I even knew him, understand?” Pierre frantically explained, needing to make sure that they grasped the severity of the situation “He’s always been here. _Always._ ”

“I understand” Lewis answered, his voice filled with so much honesty that Pierre believed him, and thus allowed himself to be pulled away from Charles so that the medical team could take him.

Pierre held on to Charles’s wrist for as long as he could before he had to let go, needing to feel the weak but present thrumming of blood beneath his skin, as confirmation that he was alive.

The paramedics then carefully lifted Charles onto a stretcher and into the ambulance that Pierre had somehow failed to notice before.

It was physically painful to lose sight of the younger man once the ambulance’s doors closed, and he knew that he would’ve demanded to ride with him if it wasn’t for Lewis’s hand that was still gently holding him down, grounding him.

As soon as the ambulance was out of sight Pierre was keeling over to throw up, retching violently as the dizziness and the stress his whole body had been through finally won out.

All the while Lewis was there to rub at his back, murmuring soothing words, while also trying to block the many cameras from having a clear image of the Frenchman.

“You okay?” he asked when Pierre finally stopped heaving, giving him a soft smile at the tiny nod he got in confirmation “Come on, I’ll ride with you back to the paddock”

Lewis practically lifted him up from the ground, keeping a firm arm around Pierre’s waist as he led them both to the car that was waiting for them.

“ _I need to get to him Lewis_ ” Pierre croaked, throat raw from all the acid that had passed through it.

The Briton furrowed his brows in confusion “What was that?”

Only then did Pierre realize that he had started speaking in Ancient Greek.

Sometimes it happened, after all the memories of his past lives came back. Somehow his first mother tongue was always the one he reverted to.

He cleared his throat, trying to rewire his brain back to English.

“I need to get to Charles”

Lewis nodded, bringing his arm up to pull him into a hug “You’ll be with him before you know it kid, I’ll make sure of it”

And Pierre really had never been more grateful for the influence Lewis had over the FIA and just the world of Formula 1 in general.

He didn’t know exactly what the Mercedes driver had done, but they had let them both go straight to the hospital without even having to check with the stewards or their respective teams first.

Pierre didn’t know whether the hospital was extremely close to the circuit or whether his mind had somehow blocked out the journey there, but before he knew it the car was pulling up in front of the Emergency Room.

The two drivers quickly entered the building, Pierre having to restrain himself from running, and he was only mildly surprised when there was a doctor seemingly already waiting for them, since he immediately walked over when his eyes fell on them.

“Hello Mr. Hamilton, I’m Dr. Evans, we spoke on the phone”

God Pierre really was grateful for Lewis.

“Is he alive?” Pierre interrupted, knowing it was rude to do so but not caring in the slightest.

Dr. Evans looked startled at the phrasing of the question but nodded nevertheless “Mr. Leclerc is alive yes, but he’s still in surgery and his condition is delicate”

The relief that washed over him like a wave was strong enough to make his knees buckle, and if it wasn’t for Lewis’s arm holding him up, he’d most certainly have fallen to the floor.

Charles was alive. He was actually _alive_.

“It was very lucky Mr. Gasly reached him when he did,” the doctor continued, face grave “he suffered from a punctured lung and internal bleeding, which meant that that lung was filling up with blood. If you hadn’t administered CPR and got him to clear it... it would’ve been too late by the time he got here”

Pierre didn’t even know what to say to that. A part of him still couldn’t believe it, still believed that this was some sort of sick joke, that someone would tell him Charles had actually died in his arms again.

But then Lewis was softly nudging his side, a big smile on his face “See Pierre, I told you you’d saved him”

He had saved him. After so many attempts, after so many lives lived and deaths suffered, he’d actually saved him.

Both Lewis and Dr. Evans seemed to notice that Pierre was about to pass out from how overwhelmed he was, and so the doctor quickly led them to a private room where he told them they could wait for Charles to get out of surgery.

The two men didn’t hesitate before dropping down on the surprisingly comfortable couch that was there, and Pierre felt so tired he was sure he could sleep for a full day - but he also knew there was no way in hell he’d even close his eyes before he could see Charles again.

He didn’t know how much time had passed, but suddenly the door flung open.

“Where is he? Is he alright? What did the doctors say? Fuck _please_ tell me he’s alright -“

“Calm down kid,” Lewis said, standing up and forcing Lando to sit down where he had been sitting “he’s still in surgery but the doctor said he’d come by the second he had more news”

Lando’s eyes were extremely puffy and red-rimmed, but Pierre was sure he looked just as wrecked as he currently did.

The younger man finally seemed to notice Pierre was sitting next to him, and he didn’t hesitate before surging forward and wrapping his arms around the Frenchman.

Pierre let out a shuddering breath as he buried his face in Lando’s shoulder, tightening his grip around him when he felt how his shoulders were shaking with sobs.

He turned his eyes to the door just in time to see Sebastian stepping in, George, Nicky Alex, Daniel and Daniil trailing in after him.

“Charles is still in surgery, but he’s alive and that’s all that matters” Lewis explained before anyone could ask, and all their shoulders seemed to sag with relief after hearing his words.

Lando pulled back from the hug, but with two quick strides Sebastian was there to take his place.

“I’m so sorry this happened” he murmured, rubbing soothing circles on his back.

“I just need him to be okay Seb” Pierre whispered, his voice sounding broken even to his own ears.

“And he will be” the German answered fiercely “Charles is a fighter, you know that. And you know he’d never leave you that easily, he’s too clingy for that”

Pierre gave a little laugh at that, Sebastian stepping back and ruffling his hair lightly, a pleased smile on his face that told him he had wanted to achieve just that.

“Yes he is, _emós mīkrós_ _kálamos_ ”

The German looked confused at the foreign words, but thankfully didn’t ask.

Everyone else also stepped forward to hug Pierre, the Frenchman feeling his heart fill with warmth when he saw just how much his friends cared about him and Charles.

George and Alex were openly crying, while Nicky, Daniel and Dany held it together better but more for the sake of their friends than anything else.

Daniel was trying his best to control his tears, and Pierre remembered that aside from himself the Australian was probably the one most acquainted with the feeling of losing someone.

Sebastian had brought him and Lewis some fresh clothes, and only then did Pierre notice that he was still wearing his blood-stained fireproofs.

His stomach churned at the sight, and he quickly ducked into the bathroom to clean himself up as best as he could and change into the simple t-shirt and sweats he had been given.

Right as he was exiting the bathroom the doctor came into the room, quirking an eyebrow as they all got to their feet and made the already small room feel even smaller.

“You will all be glad to know that Mr. Leclerc is out of surgery,” he said, clearly sensing that he needed to reassure them that Charles was fine before going into specifics “we were able to repair his lung and thankfully the wounds that caused the internal bleeding were minor”

Pierre finally allowed himself to drop the tension he had been carrying since that morning - that morning that felt like it had happened a lifetime ago.

Lando started crying again, but now from sheer relief, burying into Alex’s embrace as the Thai carded gentle fingers through his hair, George somehow managing to wrap a long arm around both of them.

“There is, of course, always the risk that his brain could have sustained some damage from the few minutes it spent without oxygen, but we won’t know that until he wakes up”

“Can I see him?”

The doctor hesitated for a moment, but he must have noticed the desperation in Pierre’s face, because he nodded in assent.

“Alright, but I’m afraid I can only allow one visitor”

Pierre turned to look at Sebastian, but the German only nodded encouragingly “Go, if anyone should be there when he wakes up it’s you”

Everyone else quickly voiced their agreement, and with one last grateful smile at his friends Pierre followed after the doctor, who led him to the wing of the hospital that was reserved for patients that required a higher level of privacy.

The doctor left him right outside the door, after instructing him to press the blue button next to the bed in case they needed anything.

The sight of Charles’s frail body lying in a hospital bed, surrounded by various beeping machines and connected to at least three tubes was enough to send Pierre into another crying fit.

But it wasn’t for the reasons people might think.

Of course that he hated watching the love of his life in such a state, but the sheer relief that hearing the steady beat of his heart gave him overpowered every single negative emotion he might have felt.

Pierre couldn’t even remember how many lives they had lived, how many times he had had to endure Charles dying in his arms.

And now, after what could have possibly been more than a millennium, he had actually managed to save him.

He had no idea what to do now, but he welcomed this uncertainty with open arms.

The Frenchman was so used to having to live his life after Charles had left him, cursed with knowledge that he was doomed to forget when it mattered most.

He was used to hating himself for decades because his lover had slipped from his fingers yet again.

But now that wasn’t the case, and as Pierre dropped down into the chair next to Charles’s bed and took his cold hand in his, the earth-shattering realization that he might get to grow old with him being almost too much to handle.

He scooted closer to the bed, resting both his elbows on top of the mattress and brining Charles’s hand up to his lips, pressing soft kisses against his knuckles.

Pierre honestly wasn’t sure how he’d ever manage to let go of his hand.

“ _Do you remember our wedding in Greece? When we stood on top of that cliff under the stars, and we promised to spend the rest of our lives together?_ ”

The Ancient Greek felt slightly foreign in his mouth, a result of not having spoken it before during his lifetime, but it still came naturally to him.

Of course, Charles didn’t answer, but Pierre wanted to think he was still listening.

“ _When we said the rest of our lives, I never imagined it would come to mean multiple lives, but we’ve kept our promise Charlie. We have. And you need to wake up okay? Because I need you in this life, I need you with me_ ”

“What language is that?”

Pierre startled, turning around towards the door to see Lewis standing there.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you” he said with an apologetic smile “Just wanted to tell you that Seb and I went over some documents the hospital needed, and we also called his family and arranged for them to fly out on our plane”

The Frenchman felt a little guilty at that, having completely forgotten about either of those things.

“Thank you, Lewis, for everything”

“Don’t even mention it” the Brit replied, coming to stand next to Pierre so he could ruffle his hair “you know how much Sebastian and I care about all of you, it’s the least we could do”

For the first time since that morning Pierre felt his lips curve into a small smile, leaning into Lewis’s comforting touch.

“Really living up to the reputation of grid dads” he joked, smile widening at the chuckle the other man let out.

“Someone has to do it. And since you’re avoiding it let me just say, you don’t have to answer my earlier question. I was just curious, it sounds like the same one you used when we were in the medical car”

Pierre blushed. It wasn’t that he didn’t want Lewis to know about it, but he wasn’t sure how he’d reasonable explain that he was now capable of speaking a myriad of languages (including a few so-called dead ones) without having to go into the curse.

As understanding as Lewis was, Pierre really doubted the Englishman would believe that.

“It was the same one” he answered simply, and Lewis patted his back in understanding.

“Alright. I convinced the doctors to let you stay at least until his mom and brothers get here, but if you need anything remember we’re all a phone call away yeah? And please try to get some rest”

Pierre nodded gratefully “I will, I promise. Tell Seb thank you on my behalf, and tell the others thanks for being here”

“Of course”

With one last squeeze of his shoulder Lewis was gone, leaving Pierre to retake the same position he had been in before.

He must have spent at least three hours like that, toying with Charles’s hand, telling him about memories they had together from their various lifetimes, until the exhaustion finally won out and he fell asleep with his head on top of the mattress.

Interestingly enough, he slept better than he had in a long time, even after everything that had happened that day and even if his position definitely wasn’t the most comfortable one.

In his dreams he saw the small island he and Charles had grown up in, bathed in moonlight, and he could hear a familiar woman’s voice humming a dulcet tune.

“Pierre?”

Another voice broke through his dreams, effectively waking him up, and he grumbled a little before opening up his eyes, blinking rapidly to chase the sleep out of them and adjust them to the darkness of the room.

As soon as his gaze landed on one of the machines everything came back to him, and he bolted upright on his chair.

Tired green eyes stared at him from the bed, and Pierre felt tears flooding his blue ones for possibly the hundredth time that day.

“Charlie” he breathed out, heart racing when the younger man smiled back at him.

“ _Hey, my love_ ” Charles croaked, and Pierre barely registered that apparently his brain also rewired back to Ancient Greek before he was jumping next to him on the bed and only just restraining himself from crushing him with his embrace.

Pierre let his tears flow freely as he held Charles close to rest his chin on his shoulder, trying to be as careful as he could even if all he wanted was press so close to him that he could feel his heartbeat against his own.

The wetness on his own shoulder let him know Charles was also crying, and a little sob rippled through his throat.

“ _You’re alive, you’re actually alive_ ”

Charles chuckled wetly, furiously nodding his head.

“ _You saved me_ ” the Monegasque pulled back so he could look into Pierre’s eyes, cradling his cheek and running a tender thumb across his skin “ _I always knew you would save me_ ”

“ _I’m sorry it took me so long_ ”

“ _I’d wait another millennia to be with you, I’d wait forever, if I had to_ ”

Pierre leaned forward to softly press his lips against Charles’s, and even though they had been doing that for so long now - both in this life and all the others - it somehow felt like a first kiss all over again.

They had kissed after remembering their past lives before, but those had always been urgent kisses, tainted by the knowledge that Charles would leave him any second.

But this time, this time they kissed slowly, tenderly, because they knew that they had all the time in the world.

The kiss was barely a press of their lips really, since both men were entirely too tired to escalate it, but regardless of that they could both feel that the other was pouring all the love they had into that slight touch.

“ _It was Aphrodite you know?_ ” Charles said against his lips “ _She helped us_ ”

Pierre was about to ask what he meant, but as it usually was when it came to his boyfriend it turned out he didn’t have to, because in that moment everything clicked together.

The Golden Apple. Cypria. The “A” pendant.

“ _Of course. She never could resist a good love story_ ”

Charles hummed happily, brushing his nose tenderly against Pierre’s “ _And thanks to her ours is just beginning_ ”

Pierre’s smile turned impossibly soft as he brushed his black hair away from his forehead, goosebumps erupting all over his skin at the motion.

“ _I can’t wait to grow old with you_ ” he whispered, relishing in the way those green eyes he loved so much sparkled at the thought.

“ _And I can’t wait to grow old with you_ ”

Before any other words could be exchanged, the beeping of the clock that was on the nightstand broke them out of their little bubble, and Pierre’s smile turned ecstatic when he saw that it was marking midnight.

“ _You’re twenty-two years and one days old now Charlie_ ” Pierre said, making Charles let out a disbelieving laugh.

“ _I am. God, I really am_ ”

After that they melted into each other’s embrace once more, relishing in each other’s presence, savoring the mad beating of their hearts that served as a reminder that they were alive.

And that was how they both fell asleep, still tangled together, with the cover of moonlight making them glow brighter than the sun ever could.

* * *

**_364 days later_ **

Pierre Gasly smiled as he looked out at the ocean that lay below the cliff they were standing on, admiring how beautiful the dark blue water looked as it sparkled under the moonlight.

It was 2020, and he was certain he’d never been happier than he was in that precise moment.

After the accident, Charles had only had to spend two months recovering from his injuries before he was allowed back into the car, and there hadn’t been one single day in those two months where he had been alone.

If Sebastian and Lewis were already protective over them, that had only increased tenfold since Suzuka, and even if he vehemently denied it Pierre could distinctly remember the way his eyes had watered when he’d been allowed to visit Charles in his hospital room.

Daniel had also cried when he saw the Monegasque, and Pierre had an inkling that it was mostly because he the situation had reminded him too much of Jules’s passing.

Lando, Alex, George and Nicky had been more focused on trying to lift Charles’s spirits than on anything else, but anyone could see that the four youngsters had been scared shitless of what a close call it had been – not used to thinking about their own mortality.

As for Pierre and Charles, it had taken a while for the two of them to get used to living together with all their memories unlocked.

They still found themselves reverting to Ancient Greek sometimes, and it was fortunate that none of their friends were curious enough to question them too hard about it because they honestly had no idea how they would explain that.

Another thing they’d sound found to be a problem was that it was incredibly hard to pretend they couldn’t understand what Sebastian was saying when he spoke German, what Dany was ranting about when he switched to Russian, or even what Checo said when he spoke in Spanish.

It was funny to be able to understand virtually every language spoken in the paddock, but it also meant they had to be constantly vigilant in order to not give it away. Most people knew they both spoke at least three languages, but they really didn’t think they could get away with being hyper-polyglots from one day to the other.

Their random history knowledge was also something they had to be careful about, since all their past lives had given them more knowledge about various issues that their twenty-first century selves didn’t have a reason to know about.

And in regard to their relationship, they were still struggling with the compulsion of living every single one of their days like it was their last.

Knowing they had managed to break the curse was still extremely surreal to them, and although they embraced the uncertainty of the future with open arms, they also had to admit that there were days where the fear of once again losing the other was too strong to handle.

But whenever one of those days rolled around, they took comfort in the fact that they had each other, and something deep inside of them told them that they would have each other for a very long time.

Even so, they weren’t totally immune to making rather impulsive decisions spurred on by that fear.

“How mad do you think everyone’s going to be when we tell them?” Charles asked, turning to look at him with an amused glint on his eyes.

The only illumination they had apart from the moon and the stars’ light were the few stray lanterns that surrounded Aphrodite’s temple, but it just made everything look all the more beautiful.

“Oh, very. I expect neither Seb nor Lewis will speak to us for at least a week, and I’m terrified of what your mom and your brothers will say”

Charles laughed, interlacing his fingers with Pierre’s and feeling excitement rushing through him as he felt the already familiar coldness of the metal brushing against his skin.

“I feel like Daniel and the boys will be more understanding, although they’ll probably be mad about us wasting the opportunity to throw a party”

Pierre chuckled, bringing their joint hands up to his lips to press a kiss against the beautiful silver ring that now adorned Charles’s fourth finger of his left hand.

“Well, whatever ire we have to face will definitely be worth it”

The Monegasque giggled, feeling like he could genuinely burst with joy.

“No doubt about it”

After the race in Japan that almost marked the one-year anniversary since they had started their new life together, the two had decided that there was only one way to celebrate properly.

And that way was taking the first flight out to Greece, more specifically Corinth, so they could elope in the city where Aphrodite’s temple resided.

They had told absolutely no one about this, even going as far as to bribing two strangers that were passing by City Hall to be their witnesses.

The small ceremony was held at eleven at night of October 15th, and neither Charles nor Pierre had been able to stop smiling from the moment they had stepped in front of the judge who would seal their union.

They had had to pay good money for the judge to marry them without any of the documentation they would have normally needed, but neither of them gave a damn.

After the ceremony they had all but ran towards the cliff where Aphrodite’s temple stood, only stopping to buy a bottle of the finest champagne they could find. They had poured some right in front of the temple’s entrance as an offering to the goddess, to whom they would both always feel indebted to, before feeding each other what was left as they looked over the skyline of the first place they had ever called home.

The newlyweds then stared at Charles’s watch as they waited for it to strike 12, and when it did, the smiles that appeared on both their faces were bright enough to blind.

“Happy twenty-third birthday, Mr. Gasly”

Charles giggled again, wrapping his arms around Pierre’s waist to pull him closer “Thank you very much Mr. Gasly”

Pierre then captured his husband’s mouth with his own, and to any onlookers it would have seemed like the two lovers were encapsulated in a pillar of light, one that shone upon them by the way the moonlight reflected off the white marble of the temple.

Maybe neither of them knew what the future had in store for them, but if there was one thing they could be certain of was that they could face it as long as they were together.

And they would be, no matter if this was their last life or just another step on their journey through time, their love was the constant they could always rely on.

* * *

_"Here when I say: I never want to be without you,_

_somewhere else I am saying_

_I never want to be without you again._

_And when I touch you, in each of the places we meet in all of the lives we are,_

_it's with hands that are dying and resurrected._

_When I don't touch you it's a mistake in any life,_

_in each place and forever"_

_-_ Bob Hicok _, **Other Lives and Dimensions and Finally a Love Poem.**_

**Author's Note:**

> And that was that! 
> 
> I really hope most of the symbolism wasn't lost on you guys, but the only thing I want to make sure no one missed is that Lewis is meant to be a descendent of Aphrodite in this, because I am now obsessed with that concept.
> 
> Anyways, I really do hope you guys liked this, and if you did please do leave kudos and/or comments because they're the fuel my little writer heart needs to keep on writing 💛


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